.Publisher's Keep in mind: The complying with is the text of a letter coming from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Retired), reflecting on the events of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed very much regarding specifics of this goal throughout the month I've been listed below, mainly for pair of factors: the first being actually that there has been extremely little opportunity to carry out that kind of creating, as well as second of all given that I am actually not sure how relaxed I am discussing notions I show to friends and family with the remainder of the planet.Effectively, clearly the world changed today. What I say or do is really minor matched up to the value of what occurred to our nation today when it was struck by ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I guess. Tough to recognize at whom to direct our rage as well as fear ...I had actually simply finished a variety of jobs this morning, the absolute most lengthy being actually the physical examinations of all workers members. In a private conversation observing that, the flight plastic surgeon informed me they were actually having a very poor day on the ground. I possessed no concept ...He illustrated the scenario to me as best he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually dumbfounded, then frightened. My initial idea was actually that this had not been a genuine discussion, that I was actually still listening to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply really did not seem to be possible on this incrustation in our nation. I couldn't also visualize the particulars, even just before the headlines of further devastation started coming in.Vladimir came by pretty rapidly, noticing that one thing extremely severe was being explained. I waved Michael into the module too. They were actually additionally impressed as well as stunned. After we signed off, I attempted to clarify to Vladimir and also Michael as finest I can the prospective immensity of this show of fear in midtown New york as well as at the Government. They plainly recognized and were really compassionate.I glanced at the Planet Chart on the personal computer to find where over the world our team were and observed that we were happening southeast out of Canada as well as would certainly be actually skipping New England in a couple of moments. I zipped around the station until I located a window that would provide me a view of NYC as well as ordered the nearby electronic camera. It took place to become a video camera, as well as I was actually appearing south coming from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to have a weird bloom to it at the base of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the city. After reviewing one of the news articles our team simply acquired, I think our team were actually examining NY around the amount of time of, or not long after, the collapse of the second tower. Just how unpleasant ...I scanned the cam the whole time the East Coast to the south to find if I could possibly observe any other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, but nothing showed up.It was fairly difficult to deal with work after that, though we possessed some to do, but on the next orbit our experts traversed the US additional southern. All 3 of us were operating a couple of cams to try to get sights of New York or even Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, however no details source could be viewed. It all appeared fabulous coming from a couple of hundred miles away. I can't think of the tragic scenes on the ground.Besides the mental influence of our country being attacked and also lots of our people as well as perhaps some close friends being eliminated, the absolute most mind-boggling feeling being actually where I am is among solitude.Upcoming day ... I think the tiredness and also psychological stress got the very best of me. I could not keep awake and remain to compose. Today was still challenging, but we began getting additional info, plus our team possessed the honor of chatting directly along with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, who ensured our team that the ground crews would continue to work as well as ensure our security, as well as the risk-free operation of the Station. Our team likewise spoke with our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, who included that the companions in the Program are all totally devoted to proceeding risk-free procedures and help. These were never ever questions for me. I know all these people! The ground crews have actually been actually incredibly encouraging, incredibly understanding of the effect of the headlines, and have actually tried to become as handy as achievable. They have all been very expert and also concentrated though I can not picture the disturbance of this particular sort of information being available in and also the idea that authorities structures could be in jeopardy. They never avoided a beat, also when relocating control centers. As well as a group of senior workers and also friends provided us a rather thorough rundown on what was actually recognized and what was being actually done in the federal government and also at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually very helpful and also kind of all of them to carry out in the midst of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has likewise been actually helpful as well as helpful, trying to uplink news articles when our own properties were actually inoperable, as well as saying kind words ...My crewmates have been actually terrific, as well. They recognize it is actually been actually a challenging time for me and also the people on the ground, and they have actually tried to be as also keeled as well as beneficial as achievable. Michael even repaired me my favorite Borscht soup for dinner. And also they offer me loads of room to presume when I needed it. They are actually quite compassionate as well as naturally shocked at whoever would do this.I know plenty of people in Washington, many individuals that travel to DC and New York City, so many that are actually flies, that I experienced sure I would get at least a couple of pieces of problem over the following couple of days. I acquired the first one today when I found out that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that hit the Government was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I came across Chic during cadet summertime when our experts resided in the D&B together, as well as our experts possessed tons of classes all together. I can not visualize what he should of undergone, and also now I listen to that he might have increased even further than our company can easily even think about by perhaps avoiding his aircraft from being actually the one to deal with the White Home. What a terrible reduction, however I'm sure Chic was combating fearlessly to the end. And also rips do not circulate the exact same in space ...It is actually complicated to explain exactly how it experiences to be the only American totally off the planet at once like this. The sensation that I ought to exist with each one of you, taking care of this, assisting in some way, is overwhelming. I understand that we perform the threshold (or beyond) of a horrendous switch in the past history of the globe. A lot of factors will certainly certainly never be the same again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not merely for the thousands as well as countless people directly affected by these ghastly process of terrorism, yet perhaps for we all. Our team will locate our own selves really feeling differently concerning lots of points, consisting of most likely space exploration, regrettably.It's dreadful to observe smoke cigarettes putting coming from injuries in your personal country coming from such a fantastic perspective. The duality of getting on a space probe dedicated to enhancing daily life on the planet as well as watching life being ruined by such unforced, horrible acts is jolting to the psyche, despite who you are actually. And the expertise that every thing are going to be various than when we released by the opportunity we land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our country and in our management that our experts will perform whatever possible to far better shield her and also our families, and also to take justice of what has actually been performed. I have assurance that the excellent individuals at NASA will do every thing required to continue our goal safely and securely and also return our company securely at the right time. And I skip all of you very much. I can't exist with you face to face, as well as our experts possess a very long way to visit accomplish our goal, however be certain that my soul is with you, and know you remain in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final letter ... Fortunately, it is actually been actually a hectic week up below. And to prove that, like our nation, our company are advancing our planned pathway along with business customarily (as much as possible). Tonight the most recent add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area are going to be actually released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday night (United States time), it will certainly dock with our team, at a port certainly never used before on the low point edge of the Service Module. This brand-new module will give our company another location to dock a Progress or Soyuz as well as will definitely provide a large airlock with two useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan matches, which our experts are going to perform a few of just before our experts get back.The problem before in taking care of today was actually insufficient news. The concern today is actually too much. It arrived at one time when email was brought back, as well as there is actually not enough time to review all of it! Plus it's also difficult to handle all of it simultaneously. Yet I enjoy getting it, and I actually value the great characters of assistance as well as relationship I am getting.We are doing well on board, acquiring our job performed, as well as speaking about things. Last evening we possessed a lengthy dialogue over supper regarding the value of these events, the feasible actions to observe, as well as what should be done. After dinner, Michael made a point of informing me that every e-mail he obtained from pals in Russia pointed out specifically to inform me exactly how regretful they were that this occurred, expanding their acknowledgements, as well as talking to how I was actually doing. Vladimir taught me the Russian term for "condolences" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are much very lengthy to pronounce easily.) Very types individuals.For the last two days, the Russian MCC has actually been good enough to broadcast live broadcasts of radio news concerning the celebration and connected accounts, to make sure I was actually effectively informed. Every specialist that has come on free throw line to discuss an operation or a complication contends some aspect extended greetings to me along with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that because of the special day of recognition in the United States, throughout the day people had actually been delivering florals and also edging all the wall structures of the United States embassy in Moscow, and this night they were lighting candlesticks in the road outside the consular office. Exactly how the globe has changed.People all over seem to be to recognize the senselessness as well as terror in this assault. As well as the significant reduction. Moscow has dealt with these kind of concerns in the last handful of years with apartment or condo as well as metro battles, so they are as distressed to eliminate this risk as we are actually. Yet the bottom collection is that there are great folks all over who wish to stay in calmness. I read that a little one talked to, "America is therefore really good to various other nations, our company constantly help every person, just how can they dislike us a lot?".I wish the example of participation as well as rely on that this space capsule plus all people in the course display daily will someday influence the remainder of the globe to operate the same way. They must!However, our experts will not be flighting over the United States during the time folks are igniting candlesticks. Do not know if we could possibly view that anyhow. We performed, having said that, find a very unusual as well as wonderful attraction a couple of mins ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our experts were actually eclipsing it and it appeared about three minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sun struck our station, so it was still unaware. It resembled a sizable comet with a straight, large rear silhouetted versus the darker earth beneath. In spite of some bad lighting fixtures for some time as the sunshine reached our home window at a low perspective, I dealt with some video recording of it as to begin with our company passed the rocket, and after that saw it begin to catch up as it got altitude as well as rate. I shot up until principal motor cutoff and booster splitting up developed just like our experts moved toward sunup on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in an extraordinary week ...Life happens, even in space. We are actually listed here to remain ... Frank.